Men from day one have been taught to take anything that comes their way. People say as a man, one should be able to be patient and tolerate a few if not most things that women do, all because she is a woman.

There are some cultures where, in a household with a brother and a sister, the brother is treated with a hard hand while the sister is treated like a princess. The reason for this, they say, is that a boy would grow into a man, go out there and experience life, be it tough or smooth, while a girl would grow into a woman and then be whisked off by a man to live with him.

In the western world today, we see how easy it is for relationships to dissolve because of the power dynamics between men and women who have made the western way of life culturally embedded in their own way of life. The keyword here is &ldquo;equality.&rdquo; Equality in a relationship means that both partners are treated with the same level of respect, have equal opportunities to express themselves, and share decision-making responsibilities. It involves a balance of power where both individuals feel valued, heard, and supported.

But is that really the case, though? Let us turn to Bryan who had met Kathy, getting to know each other and not in a relationship yet, and then in a later article, we would turn to Joel who is in a relationship with Stacey and has been for about two years. In the latter, we would talk about how finance has a huge role to play in their relationship.

<h3>Connections via dating apps</h3>

Bryan and Kathy, who met each other on a dating app, both thought it was a match made in heaven. From the day they saw each other, it was a no-brainer matching with each other as they both saw what they were physically looking for in a companion. Kathy had the smile, the beauty, the right age, and stature while Bryan looked like something out of a movie, Kathy&rsquo;s 007. They went on to form a meaningful dialogue with each other.

Weeks went by, they had already exchanged numbers and were on track to meet each other for the first time on a date. During the first date, everything was just as one would expect; it was as if love was starting to blossom. The first date was successful, but on the second date, something happened. Bryan started receiving notifications on his phone from the dating app. As a smartphone user, if the phone is not on silent, the notification sound would trickle out. Kathy knew that sound as she too had the same dating app, the same one where they both matched.

Kathy was furious! She could not believe that after the connection she made with Bryan, he would still have the dating app installed. She made a huge fuss over it, but Bryan tried his best to make her understand that he wasn&rsquo;t trying to get to know other women. A date that was supposed to be one of love turned to hell for Bryan. Kathy then stormed out of the restaurant; Bryan chased but she was not having it. Bryan felt so bad, kicking himself and saying, &ldquo;I knew I should have deleted this stupid app!&rdquo; He was not trying to get to know anyone else; his focus was on Kathy. Days went on, he tried to reach Kathy via call, text, and voice notes, but all he got was air. He decided to give her some space.

A few days later, Bryan received a text from Kathy to talk about the situation. Bryan acknowledged it, and they proceeded to have a phone call about the situation. Bryan was so apologetic; he pleaded and assured Kathy this would never happen again. At first, Kathy was being elusive, maintaining a sense of mystery, saying the trust had gone and Bryan would have to work very hard to regain her trust. Bryan conformed, anything to get his Kathy back. He could not stand the thought of losing her to someone else. She then agreed to continue getting to know him.

One day Bryan was entertaining Kathy at his home. He had everything all made up: food, wine, the works. He wanted to treat Kathy to a special meal prepared by him; in other words, he wanted to make her day special. Kathy then decided to go to the toilet. While she was there, her phone was in the kitchen area, and it went off with notifications. Bryan, for some reason, decided to have a look at the phone. A single glance at the lock screen revealed that the notifications came from the same dating app where they met. Bryan was confused; he did not know what to think or believe. The notifications kept coming in, and it was from the same person as if there was some sort of conversation that had been had prior to her coming over to his place, or one that was ongoing for a while.

Kathy came out of the toilet, and Bryan then confronted her about the messages he saw on her phone. Unlike Bryan&rsquo;s response when Kathy noticed the notifications on his phone, Kathy started ranting and went on the defensive, telling him that there was no trust hence why she decided to go back onto the dating site.

Bryan was gobsmacked! A lot was running through his mind. Why was she at his place receiving all the special treatment he was giving her? Was he dreaming? Was he being gaslit? She then took her phone and left his house. He proceeded to chase once again, pleading and begging her not to leave.

Bryan was left standing at his doorstep, heart pounding and mind racing. The dinner he had meticulously planned and the heartfelt gestures he had prepared now seemed meaningless. The realization hit him hard: the trust between them was irreparably broken.

<h3>Reflections on Trust and Expectations</h3>

As a man, you must understand that no matter what you do, the advantage would never fall on you. It is up to you to create your own advantages; trust, they say, is earned. You should know better than to put trust at the forefront, especially when dealing with someone whose history is unknown. Would you say Bryan acted as a simp in this situation? Who knows. But one thing is for sure: you can never allow emotions to get the best of you. Emotions would allow you to conform to expectations laid out by others towards you.

In conclusion, relationships require mutual trust, communication, and respect. Both partners must work together to build a solid foundation. While societal expectations and cultural norms can influence behaviour, it is crucial to navigate these challenges with honesty and integrity. Only then can a true and lasting connection be formed.

Navigating Trust and Expectations in Modern Relationships

We live in a society which forces people to hide the way they do things&hellip; In as much as it is said to be a democratic society in which freedom of expression and the absence of stigma should be in place, we are still scared of really staying true to our reputation and not being concerned with what people might think of you.

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The Pressure to Conform

In today&#39;s world, the pressure to conform to societal norms and expectations can be overwhelming. Social media, in particular, amplifies this pressure, as individuals are constantly exposed to curated versions of others&#39; lives. This often leads to a fear of judgment and the compulsion to present an idealized version of oneself, rather than an authentic one. Men, in particular, may feel this pressure acutely, as traditional notions of masculinity emphasize strength, success, and emotional stoicism.

The Double-Edged Sword of Attention

Courting attention by adhering to societal expectations can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it can lead to social approval and validation, which can boost one&#39;s self-esteem and social standing. On the other hand, it can create a disconnect between one&#39;s public persona and private self, leading to feelings of inauthenticity and inner turmoil. The constant effort to maintain a fa&ccedil;ade can be mentally and emotionally draining, ultimately disrupting one&#39;s mindset and well-being.

The Impact on Mental Health

The need to mask one&#39;s true self can have significant implications for mental health. Living a life that is not true to oneself can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. The dissonance between one&#39;s true identity and the persona presented to the world can cause a sense of alienation and loneliness. It can also hinder the development of genuine relationships, as meaningful connections are built on authenticity and trust.

Breaking Free from the Mask

To break free from the cycle of masking one&#39;s true self, it is essential to cultivate self-acceptance and resilience. Embracing one&#39;s true identity, including imperfections and vulnerabilities, can be a powerful step towards mental and emotional well-being. This involves challenging societal norms and expectations and allowing oneself the freedom to be authentic. You must have noticed women falling for men who hold that reputation of being a bad boy of one who breaks rules all the time and not really having the time of day for the so-called good boys. This has been something that has eaten men up for so many years, why go for the least favourable option when you know they would always hurt you? The answer is, women do not care about that, they want the thrill, the chase, the mystery, and without those they would be bored&hellip; Women want to live a soft life with pleasure surrounding them but the saying that &ldquo;New items would surely turn to sales&rdquo; is one they do not apprehend. As a Pimp you want to hold and become that which is not the norm in this day and age.

Embracing Authenticity

Embracing authenticity requires a shift in mindset. It involves recognizing that one&#39;s worth is not determined by social approval or validation, but by being true to oneself. This can be a difficult journey, as it often involves confronting deep-seated fears and insecurities. However, the rewards are immense, including improved mental health, stronger relationships, and a greater sense of fulfilment.

Practical Steps Towards Authenticity

<ol start="1">
	<li>Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on your values, beliefs, and what truly matters to you. This can help you understand who you are and what you stand for.</li>
	<li>Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to things that do not align with your true self. This can help you maintain your integrity and prevent burnout.</li>
	<li>Seek Support: Surround yourself with people who accept and support you for who you are. Positive relationships can provide the encouragement and validation needed to stay true to yourself.</li>
	<li>Practice Vulnerability: Allow yourself to be vulnerable with trusted individuals. Sharing your true thoughts and feelings can strengthen relationships and build trust.</li>
	<li>Challenge Societal Norms: Question and challenge societal expectations that do not resonate with your true self. This can empower you to live authentically and confidently.</li>
</ol>

The journey to authenticity is not an easy one, but it is essential for maintaining mental and emotional well-being. By recognizing the pressures to conform and actively working towards embracing one&#39;s true self, individuals can break free from the cycle of masking their true identities. Ultimately, living authentically leads to a more fulfilling and meaningful life, where one&#39;s reputation is built on genuine self-expression rather than societal expectations.

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